In these pressing times, what have you been doing besides, smoking too much, drinking, worrying or having a hard time getting out of bed? Ten years ago I would have been right there with you. Recently (last January) was my last melt down, and I came out of it with a joy that I have never experienced, that has lasted t0 this day. Clients leaving, friends losing their jobs etc., I still feel joyful. It made no sense to me then, since it seemed that my world was falling apart: the rent wasn't there, and I was moving my practice from an office in Santa Monica to home. I can only say to my friends who inquired about this profound change in me, that I think it was because I had been, in all the chaos, sticking to and increasing my daily practice.
To do something everyday that helps you center yourself is certainly helpful on bad day's(Monday's) and on good days. I have tools, practices that I have been doing for some time, and it just felt like my inner harvest had bloomed on that seemingly gray day last January. I was still broke, with no assuraty of any revenue coming in soon, but I felt great joy.
Tools, I teach my clients, are what you use when your overwhelmed, depressed, angry, despondent and have no energy. A tool can be as simple as sitting quietly for three minutes everyday and just listening to your breath. Another tool could be doing one yoga asana everyday. Others could be conscious breathing, doing your beads, exercising, cleaning, forcing yourself to be grateful for what you "DO" have. It's most important to do any of the above on a continuum, everyday without question. My teacher told me that the most boring meditations are the best, because just by the "doing" you are accruing grace/energy/ positive thinking, and one day all of what you've been doing on a daily basis rolls over with all of it's interest and you have a breakthrough, a peek at the divine in yourself.
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If all the above sounds like whooey to you, then simply ask for discipline, set your timer for three minutes and sit and listen to your own breathing for 90 days without missing a day. There is something in the spiritual whelm ( I can't think of it now) but the number 90 is an important plateau for any change to take place.
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Make a short list of what your going to do the next day on the night before. For most of us, our mood comes up as the sun begins its descent. It makes sense to make this list when your feeling up to it, more positive, with the possibility that tomorrow will be better. Take this written list and tape to your bathroom mirror or refrigerator and be sure to mark off all that you have done on it, every day that you use it. It's called cognitive/ behavioral in "therapy world", but it really helps to ground you when it feels like your just a flag blowing in forces that are out of your control. -
How you handle this "period" that we're going through is going to be very telling on how you come out of it. If you, with a practice, are reading this, then you know that your much more available to cut through all the confusion and find out that there are opportunities right now, that are presenting themselves to you, but if you in a constant agitated space of "overwhelm" then your not going to recognize them.
John is a psychotherapist in private practice and can be reached: http://www.johnshinavier.com/
